what if i killed someone for me?

 I stood there in my new room. Tables shifted, posters replaced and re-taped, just the shelf with my most intimate belongings in life, my books, laid there in vain, devoid of my passionate touch. Thousands of beads of sweat trickled down my forehead and onto my cheeks, draping over my eyelids as if it's proud of giving my eyes a shiny touch which shimmered in the one small bright light above the blue walls. 

There was only one thing good in this room which keeps me rooted here than anywhere else, of course there is nowhere else in this small house where i could travel my table to; the tube light. Temptation is a grappling void, once you give in to it, you are suddenly the most foolish person in the world. I guess the same happened with me, but the thing is, there is nowhere else to go.

I could hear the low-high rubble in the front drawing room visible from the wide open door of this stupid tempting room. My blood relatives talking but nothing could be heard as of the loud 'wind-cutting' blades of the ceiling fan. Thank god.

My mom was in the straight room, the A/C one, and i was here far from her in the room where the heat of the room seemed much more than the 36 degree outside. I wish i could burn a hole in the ground at this moment and seep and disappear into it's cracks. Already i think my mind is torn apart into various personalities, some i didn't even know intimately, so i bet they will make better colors in the cracks. I don't know what this time wants from me anymore. I was happy studying in my own zone, and then this low hemoglobin thing burst out from nowhere like a demon out of some fucking twisted reality where there was nothing surrounding but just past sown seeds by my blood relatives coming to life. No matter how much i run and hide from them, they appear before me again and again like something i dearly not wanted to happen and it happened. 

I don't like using cuss words much. I don't even know what must be the things which will make me happy anymore. I don't want to live to see the day where my mom passes out this year because of just one more seizure which i have a fucked up sensation for. I know universe is listening but i guess it's only listening my biggest fears and making them come true like a slap on my face for thinking like that, 'cause it maybe doesn't knows that the mind visits places i cannot be at. I may have once wished desperately for everyone in my family to get killed but being in the suffering was not part of the plan. 

"I don't know what i am talking about but you get it don't you?" I looked a the person standing beside me. In long drapes of dark silk gold and chiseled face was Hades (search it), he nodded.

He took an elegant seat by the bedside and stared up at me. I was lost in the inaudible world outside my room. For once it felt like it was all coming to a dark golden blur. "Do you want them all gone?" Hades asked with an undertone of precision.

I wondered his question for a while before looking at him in the eyes. "I wish i could but i fear it will hurt me." My brows may have furrowed for a bit but i couldn't feel it. 

'So what?' He said with a casual tone, swiftly placing his long pick-mattock like thing beside him slanting on the bed sheet. 'We all get hurt by the decisions we make in life. Someone gets hurt, someone dies. It's a vicious cycle you cannot escape. And if this is your reason for not escaping this grievingly stupid situation, i wonder if i made the right choice by choosing you for a wish, as you are not hard enough to hold even a feather.'

I shot him a look, but i suppressed my at the moment insignificant attitude. I made my decision without another thought, besides this is all i want. 'I want them gone.' Hades smirked at my answer and i tilted my head in confusion. 'What?'

'You are so naive white flower, i bet giving into temptation is all you do. But I'll grant your wish as it would be doing my duty. And i would like to offer one more reward for your exhaustion. Would you like to hear it?' His brows rose up in excitement.

'Do tell.' I crossed my arms.

'You get to tell them the reason of your act of murder before they transcend to their respective places in the void of universe, so they'll get the subtle hint in their next lives for what to not do. Do you take it?'

I thought to myself, it was the best gift i would ever receive i was sure. 'Deal.'

 Hades rose up from his position and took hold of his armor. We stood side by side as he murmured some spells and at once everything turned dust and black. It felt a lot windy by my side as Hades stood towering in the ferociously flowing wind. I covered my eyes from the pins of dust and tried to stay still as the room where once everything from outside came inaudible, now it was screaming at my senses. I thought i won't be able to hold still a second longer when it suddenly stopped. 

It took me some time to make myself adapt to the new surroundings but to my surprise there was only darkness which i could see. 'Is it over?' I asked in haze when i could feel Hades standing right beside me and the vicinity gave me a warmth for as if i knew it from a long time. 

'Yes it is. I am afraid you don't know the natural procedure but it comes easy to not worry. I'll tell you that you just have to walk over to the places from your room position where the people sat whom you would like to kill. You take a hold of them out the dark and then you'll be the only thing they see before they know their death is near. Told you, it comes easy.' 

I understood the assignment and first walked 4 paces in a diagonal direction and touched through the dark upon a frail body with bones of hard rock. The white person glowed at my touch and it all came into view a second later, my eldest paternal aunt. She was someone i cannot even accept being part of my family tree. I would burn the branches the second someone saw me looking at it. She made my mother cry lots before me and i would not let any single tear of my mother go to waste without a revenge. When i looked at the most ugly face in the eye, which honestly didn't deserve to look into mine, the wrinkled skeleton started shaking furiously and trembled till it fell off the couch and on the ground, it was like she was having an electric shock but her ears wide open for my words. I knelt down, a sheepfoot knife firm in my head, and proceeded to draw her wrinkled face with a map of blood lines, as my words drip venom as i spoke the ugliest truth of her fucking small low life and motive. She died an ugly death just as her face felt all life. 

One by one, everyone faced the same consequences. Ugly truths, extreme hatred pouring, vicious torture and a sudden startling or slowly struggling death. Hades reined after all in everything. 

As i left the last person, my mind could only feel completely devoid of any kind of hurt, hatred or agony. I was finally free, i knew it. But did it even once felt like i was leaving something behind? No. Not at all. I did kill, but i killed someone for me.