Beach

 I was sitting on the beach alone. 

The cool wind pressing down my neck, becoming colder and harder by the evening. I arrived in the morning with nothing but just my phone in my one pocket and a hat on my head covering the sun. 

I never knew how good it felt on the beach alone at the time of the year when no one proceeds for the beaches. I chose a clever one for myself. There is no one except for me on this winding sand.

I sat down and the warm sand hugged my thighs. I half hoped for a crab to come alive but there was nothing. I was really alone. 

I looked around the side I was. Few typical coconut trees by my side and a glorious red sunset before me. I stared at the horizon to see the colors slowly melting into each other and forming hues I have never really seen before. My heart seemed to slow down a bit at the moment. 

My mind started remembering all the times I could have been here with my family of four. We could have laughed about the water tides, sipped the refreshing juice by the counters or maybe running around chasing like we are some teens. Okay it might be a hyperbole but the feeling is same. Of being free and alive.

I took my eyes off the shore suddenly. My hands racing to touch someone, some skin I can feel under my running veins, my heart beating frantically for some unknown reason and I look around to find some living soul. There was really no one. Only me and my wretched life as it seems.

But I peeked a glance at the setting sun again. The symbol of someone for me reflecting through its perfect oval curve. I remember the time I met those 7 boys. 

They were older than me, the oldest having difference of 6, but they strangely felt like home when I was really under a shade and a nameplate of my parents outside the front door. I was at unease most of the time but they made me feel like it was really okay to fail sometimes. It was so okay to be confident for the most part but losing at the end, to be downed in the first few steps but rising high at last. It was okay to be everything you never asked for, it was okay that you are going through it for a reason.

I started reasoning out my life remembering those 7 lives that stayed with me till the end of my high. 

Now as I stay and touch the sand beneath me, I feel as if the grains might have ever touched their curls. My heart started slowing down, and I didn't look around for anyone else anymore. Despite not having a hand at the back, I knew the memories of my 7 would be enough for me to last years without a hand around.